Sunday, December 24, 2006


It's already out! I KNEW it would pop up this time of year!!! "Al Qaeda" is threatening to blow up trains on Christmas Day that DON"T EVEN RUN ON CHRISTMAS DAY!!!!!

How is "Qaeda" going to acomplish this task? NOONE KNOWS!!! But there has been "signifigant chatter" about it! Alright! I'm only going to say this once! "Signifigant Chatter" means this attack only exists in some delusional paranoid mind! The reason that it is being trotted out to the public, and virtues extoled for those who "prevented" it, is that Bush thinks he needs a boogie man to keep us in line! Every time his policies get questioned, here comes the "Barely Contained Terrorist Plot" to send "The Sheople" bleating for peotection! Never are any of these "BCTP"s discussed for any time in the press, and are quietly, and firmly snatched back into The NSA's magic box when anybody starts asking uncomfortable questions! Time, and time again, has Bush used this ploy on the American Public, and the result of which is easily seen in the last election! We KNOW it's bullshit!! We know how the rabbit gets into the hat!!! It don't work any more!

So now what happens? Does the American People once more buy into this shit that the Bush faithful are slinging with such furvor? Or do we see it all as bullshit and firmly teel "The Dimpled Darling of the Desperatly Deluded" that we see through ALL the bullshit, so just give it up!

All this brings us to the gist of this post which is "Can't we just get along?"! Can't we accept the fact that in ALL the world there might be people different than us? That these people have the right to be different? That we don't have the right to change them political, religiously, or cuturally into what we think they should be? That at this time of "Peace on Earth, Goodwill Towards Man", can't we learn to COEXIST?!!!!!

Thursday, December 14, 2006

IMPORTANT UPDATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Alright people! Listen up! This is some SERIOUS SHIT!!!!!! I want every body that can read this to go to "" and read the post entitled "The Box Bush Finds Himself In"!!



WE as Americans must now make up our minds! Will we let our policy be determined by foreign governments and Big Oil?! Or will WE as Americans stand against what this fucking nut job is up to? Will we allow him and his cabal of Neocon liars and theives sacrifice our children on a cross made in the shape of an oil rig! Shall we obediantly feed the future of our country to the Saudi Arabian Royal Family? Or will we stand as a PEOPLE to bring this to a halt!

I was wrong about the Naval expidition! I was dead wrong! They aren't there to bring soldiers back! THEY ARE THERE TO BEGIN A MAJOR OFFENSIVE! Oh and we aren't the only ones there! Most European countries have sent ships, troops, and logistical support INCLUDING Germany and France! Canda is there! Austalia is there! Third world countries that barely HAVE a military are headed to the Arabian Sea, or already have forces in place there!


I will NEVER give Bush the benefit of the doubt again! My bad! I admit it! I was told by a friend in Government Service, "Surely The President isn't that stupid!" WELL, GUESS WHAT!!! HE WAS WRONG!!!! I WAS WRONG!!!! ANYBODY THAT EVER HAD A SINGLE GRAIN OF FAITH IN THIS FUCKING IDIOT OR HIS ADMINISTRATION WAS WRONG!!!!

I have to take a break, or I'm going to break another keyboard!

Thursday, November 16, 2006

Here Comes The Navy!!!

I still haven't heard from that contact of mine, and the time is now past for getting any meaningful information from that source, so I'll go on with out it. Briefly, here's what's going on:

There is one nuclear powered Enterprise-class aircraft carrier in "The CENTCOM Area of Responsibility" as we speak. This ship is the original "USS Enterprise, (CVN 65)"

Along with the Enterprise, The following US Navy ships are heading to the same area:

Boxer Expiditionary Strike Force, which consists of:

USS Boxer (LHD 4) (Amphibious Assault Dock)
USS Dubuque (LPD 8) (Amphibious Transport Dock)
USS Comstock (LSD 45) (Landing Ship)

The following US Navy Ships are heading directly to the Persian Gulf:

Iwo Jima Expiditionary Strike Force, which consistst of:

USS Iwo Jima Jima (LHD 7)
USS Nashville (LPD 8)
USS Whidbey Island (LSD 41)

Now here's what a "Expitionary Strike Force" is, does, and consists off.

You'll notice these strike forces are made up of three types of ships. First is the Flagship which is a "Wasp Class Amphibious Assault Deck" (LHD). Think of it as a baby aircraft carrier, with a big back door, but don't sell this baby cheap! This so-called "Dock" packs one hell of a punch! It's got two Sea Sparrow Launchers, three 20mm phalanx (CIWS) mounts, and eight .50 caliber machine guns.

Along with the mounted weponry, it caries forty-two CH-46 Sea Knight Helicopters, five AV-88 Harrier Aircraft, and six ASW Helicopters! And when that big back door drops open, 2074 Marines come storming out for a "Semper Fi" party! Ain't no shit folks! This is one bad-ass barge!

Number two of this Tinity of tribulation is the Austin Class Amphibious Transport Dock (LPD). Think of it as the bastard child of an Aircraft Carrier, and a light Destroyer, with the same big back door as the (LHD). It carries The same two Sea Sparrows, along with two Phalanx (CIWS) Mounts, two 25mm MK 38 Guns, and the obligatory eight .50 Caliber Machine Guns

When the back door drops, 840 Marines pop out and hand out the hurt! This is a LANDING ship!

Last but not least, we have the Whidbey Island Class Amphibious Transport Dock. This is a heavily armored ship a little smaller than a (LPD). It carries Two Phalanx (CIWS) Mounts, two 25mm MK 38 Guns, along with six .50 Caliber Machine Guns.

The big back door drops for up to 504 Marines primed for plunder. Aircraft are limited to mostly helicopters like the (LPD)

Ah and it only gets better form here! Along with the Boxer Expitionary Strike Force is a dandy little tin can courtesy of our northern neighbors! It's called The HMCS Ottowa IV (FFH-341), and I WANT ONE!!!!

The Ottawa is a "Canadian Patrol Frigate" and it was concieved, laid and built in Canada. These guys must have great flashes of brilliance while sitting around the stove toking up on BC Bud! THIS THING ROCKS!!!

It's got a steel superstucture with full ballistic protection, redundant propulsion, and electrical systems, a redundant distibuted combat system, survivable combat controll, and intergratred communication center. Add all this to an excelent automated damage controll system, and comprehensive NBC citadel, and we're STILL not done! This thing is completely shock-protected, and designed to withstand the airblast loads from a nuclear device!

As delivered, this ship has the highest rating in anti-submarine warfare in the world! And it's deployed with the Boxer Group, and under US command in Thhe Arabian sea as we speak!

If we look at the capabilities and design intent of the ships listed, we can come to only one conclusion. THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!!! This is not a training exercise of any type! There is not ONE upper echelon officer in The Department of The Navy stupid enough to send two Expiditionary Stike Groups two practicaly the same place where an armed conflict is already under way! THEY JUST DON"T DO IT!!! These ships have a cause of action, and an objective! Since our "Allies" are reaching out to Iran and Syria, we can tentativly cross that scenario off the list.

I can only hope that this deployment means what everybody I know in the military think it does: That these vesels have been sent to begin removing US personel from Iraq! And from all the information I've been able to get, this is the case! I was told about three months ago, if Rummy got the boot, expect to see the redeployment of troop from Iraq by January.

Cheney is strangely silent, and Rove has nothing to say either. They are the last two dyed-in-the-wool- neocons left, and Bush's dad is sending all his old friends to save the family name from further embarrassment, and there is no bigger embarrassment than "Operation Iraqi Liberation"! The war in Iraq HAS to be over if the Repigs stand any chance at all at getting into the White House in 2008! Even then it's iffy! The American people will NOT be sold another war on another front! Bush blew his "Political Capital" just like he blew "Arbusto"

Bush has been handed his ass on a used paper plate, and HE KNOWS IT! Why else would he have given Rummy the boot the day after the election! I knew the House was ours, but even I didn't see the Senate going! Bush couldn't get fly confirmed as a shit eater right now!

It was a nice trick! Send the ships out quietly, with a handy cover story about "Naval Exercises" and the like! Then if the public opinion swung back, he could bring 'em back' and fill them with fresh troops for the slaughter! But we got the House, AND the Senate! This will be a very short trip!

This could be some very good news indeed!!

Tom, Keep praying for peace! Sometimes the answer is "YES!"

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

See You all Soon

I'm in the middle of tracking the United States Navy, and various other countrie's progress towards The Persian Gulf, as well as deployment of certain military intelligenc operatives to that region. I will be posting about this very soon.

Sorry about the time laps, but this is some extremly complicated shit! I'm VERY gratefull to my Belgian friend who has helped me quite a bit by sending me web addresses that are practically unknown here. I have a basic idea of what ships are involved, and what countries, but I'm waiting for a reply form another friend on exactly what they hope to accomplish. When I hear from this person, you'll be hearing from me!

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

Open Letter To President Pork Pie

Dear President Pork Pie,

How DARE you call me "confused", you sanctimonious prick! You lying, hang-jowled clown! How fucking dare you!

How dare you send that fat-faced, lying, ass-wipe Cheney to declare that the inteligence leading up to "Operation Iraqi Liberation", (Didn't know that we know that was the first name for your little misadventure! Did you? We're not as stupid as you were led to believe! Are we?), was "flawed" when the evidence is so painfully clear, that you were told MONTHS in advance it was all a snow job! How dare you treat the American People with such disdain!

Just how fucking stupid do you think we are? Do you think we can still be scared by empty threats! Are you so deluded as to think any thing you say has the slightest shred of credibility left? Have you slipped into the wild fantasy that we cannot see the truth? That your derisive sneers, and hollow pronouncements, will not be taken at face value, and seen for the desperate grasping of a despot discovered as such?

How dare you stand at the edge of that yawning pit in Manhattan, where the remains of thousands of American Citizens, and hundreds of NYPD and NYFD personel were reduced to dust and burned opon a pire, along with our inocence as a country, and say that I do not feel the sting! That I do not grieve! That I , because I treasure the civil rights that I as an American sailor, and an American Citzen have fought for, all my life, uphold, and will die for, am some how less an American for doing so! I will not surrender them to the likes of you! I will NOT stand idly by while you and your neocon masters grind under your jackboots, that which brave Americans willingly gave their lives, and their limbs to defend! That because I stand to fight you with my vote, my vehemence, and my vigor all that you are, and stand for, that I'm less patriotic than The Sheople, who bleat fawning at your feet, to have their rights slaughtered! How dare you stand at a sixteen acre hole in the ground full of your empty promises and accuse ME!!! HOW FUCKING DARE YOU!!!!!

How fucking dare you trot out that insignifigant weasel Rumsfeld to name me as an "apeaser" when I say that Iraq was a mistake! When I say you failed in your mission in Afganistan because you went off chasing oil in Iraq! When I say you sent thousands of our young men and women into a sandy hell, ill equiped, under trained, and unarmored! How dare you declare me as "unpatriotic" when I object to your blind squandering of our nation's future on a pipedream in the clouds! How dare you send that simpering chicken-hawk out to label me as someone who "Just doesn't get it", because I take issue with the destruction of America's honor and integrity abroad, so your buddies in the oil cabal can rack up the profits, on the blood and bones of brave American soldiers! You crack-brained ass-wipe, I get it all too fucking well! I've heard such statements before! Spoken by men with names like Gobel, and Hitler to masses of fawning facists! I have seen what you are, sir! I've seen what you are trying to turn this country into, and you will do so over my dead body!!!!

Send your goons after me!!! Send your Haliburton Heavies! Send you Blackwater Blackguards! Send your toy soldiers! You will find that I'm not to be denied! Lock me in Gitmo! My soul will not be caged, and my voice will not be silenced! Bring on the waterboard! You lying sack of shit, HOW DARE YOU SAY "WE DO NOT TORTURE"!!!

Do your worst, I will not be broken! Kill me, burn me, and throw my ashes in the ocean, and my spirit will curse you from the nether world! I fear only what I do not understand, and I understand you all too well! You have no hold on me! You have no threat to use against me!

I am the angry truth that eats at your illusions! I am the horrible voice of dissent that cannot be silenced! I am the rage of the forgotten victims, killed by your madness! I am the wails of the orphans and weeping parents who grieve for those fed into the machine of your making for the glory of Halliburton, and the profits of Exon-Mobil! I am the voice you can not silence! I am the itch you can not scratch! I am all that you fear, and all that you hate! I am the Clear Eyes that see all the way to the depth of your squirming, twisted soul! And I know the fear that hides there! I AM YOUR WORSE FUCKING NIGHTMARE!!!!!!

I cannot be appeased!

I cannot be overcome!

I cannot be conquered!

And when all is said, and done, all that will be left, is you, and me!

Saturday, September 09, 2006

TDS Internet Service and Other Nightmares!

Here on the outskits of the sleepy little town of Saluda North Carolina, I have MANY little mindfucks to make my life interesting (no cable TV, dry county, five miles to the nearest rolling papers)! First and foremost is my ISP, TDS! I (and many others) have been trying to get DSL in Saluda and its outskirts for the last seven years! Back in June a big full-color posting popped up in every email box in Saluda! Let there be rejoicing! There was to be DSL in Saluda! Salivating with delight, I was the first to put in my order, and danced with glee! Ah but such was not to be!

It seems that while DSL was available in the town of Saluda, I lived on the outskirts! A mere 1.5 miles from town! I was on a "remote" line, and as such could not get DSL! Ah well! Shit happens!

Since Saluda got DSL, however, my dial up service has been slow to nonexistant, and has been going downhill ever since! I have TRIED to post on this blog SIX TIMES, only to find that the ISP had disconected while I was typing and the whole post had disapeared into the nether regions!

I have some good stuff that I WILL be posting next week as soon as TDS gets finished fixing this problem! For the last two months I've repeatedly called my local TDS office (Which is some 50 miles away!) Only to get a voice mail with a full box! I actually had to get nasty and report them to my state utility board to get anything done! I can post short stuff like a comment or such, but the long posts which President Pork Pie and crew deserve is denied me! I WILL NOT pull punches on this blog! I WILL NOT be constrained by time or anything else to say what I beleive needs to be said! I haven't lost the will, I haven't had the means! So watch for some serious shit very soon!

Thursday, July 20, 2006

President Pork Pie's Busy Week

Well! Hasn't President Pork Pie had a busy time THIS week!

First he takes Tony Blair to the seedy side of life by sharing profanities while dining with the table manners of a cud-chewing goat at the G8 conference! You'ld think that this unfortunate incedent would be enough for The Comander and Theif at the G8, but no! It seems that he had heard that some countries in the world still had a positive attitude towards The United States and it's President, and he was having none of that! He would prove to all and sundry that this country indeed has a madman at the helm, and this was his time to shine!

With a disturbingly leacherous grin on his face, he siezed the German Chancellor by the shoulders, and attempted to give her a massage. The good lady responded to his unwanted attention as if something cold, wet and clammy was trying to crawl into her clothes! I suppose if he was hoping to provide her with a "happy ending" he was shit out of luck! In fact, the only thing he didn't do at the G8 conference was scratch his balls, and pick his nose! And he probably did, but we just didn't get it on tape! (We can all give thanks now, for small miracles!)

After sharing with the world these unseemly escapades, and once again proving to the world at large that no male member of the Bush family can keep his mouth shut or his hands to himself when traveling abroad, Air Force One whisked the Dimpled Darling of the Desperatley Deluded back to Capitol Hill. Ever being one to keep a bad thing rolling, he dusted off his "Veto" stamp and handily made Nancy Reagan cry and disenfranchised 72% of the American People by vetoing a stem cell research bill that would have given hope to millions of suffering Americans! (My own CP afflicted stepson being one of them!)

Of course he wasn't the only Republican to make a total ass of himself this week over stem cell research. Seator Sam Brownback of Kansas produced a poster of an eagle and an egg, and used it to offer an argument which states by it's logic that he is indeed a vaginal orifice. As an encore he produced a child's artwork with lots of Xs and Os, and explained that the figures rendered were human embryos. He goes on to explain that one embryo (with hair and a smiley face no less) represented the one that got adopted. The frowning ones were sad because they were frozen, and one was crying piteously "You're going to kill me?!"

One can understand how a young child could fail to understand that these embryos are microscopic blobs of protoplasm, being held in a suspended animation. We can understand that a child could not and should not be expected to know that embryos in this state have neither hair or faces. However Senator Sam Brownback of Kansas should know better! But then again, what can you expect from a man, who fancies himself a vagina, and proudly goes to go to great lengths to prove it with the use of visual aids on the floor of The United States Senate?!!

Ah yes! It has been a busy week indeed for Bush and Company! But it is only Thursday morning, and three whole days are left! I DO wonder what they'll do next? Maybee kick some puppies, or burn some kittens, or rectally insert firecrackers into a toad.. Oh wait! He already did the toad thing!

I've come to the conclusion that Bush, like Steven King, does indeed have the heart of a small boy! And like Steven King, he probably keeps it in a jar on his desk!

Thursday, July 06, 2006

President Pork Pie's Birthday

Well!! Today is President Pork Pie's birthday! I should be overjoyed! Guess what? I'm not!

The very fact that we have this gibbering idiot in the White House should scare the shit out of one and all! I'm sure all the pubdits on Faux News will be falling over themselves to be the first ones to blow sunshine up his ass. Bill O'Rielly will probably want to blow something else up his ass! I believe I've talked enough about George Bush's ass!

Sunday, June 11, 2006

Asinine Asswipes, And Others Such As Ann Coulter

Ms. Ann Coulter recently released a book whose tittle I will not name here! To name the tittle of this book would give it merrit! It does not deserve merrit! I shall give it none here!

In this book Ms. Coulter shrieks in a banshee wail, all sorts of horrible accusations, concerning those American sisters who had their husbands ripped from the loving embraces of their famillies in an act that this country has yet to explain or even fully investigate! To call these attacks "ugly "would be like reffering to a warthog as "mildly unattractive"! These wild accusations are pattently false and can be seen to be so by any human being with an ounce of grey matter! To repeat them here would give them voice. They deserve no voice! I shall give them none here!

This book also contains suggestions that these widows are actually enjoying their husbands deaths, and were named "harpies" by Ms. Coulter! To discuss these suggestions would give them consideration! They deserve no consideration! I shall give them none here!

In fact, I will say no more about Ms. Coulter's book, except to say that those of us that have heard this vile misrepresentation of Womanhood spew her bile on all and sundry know what to expect from her! In this book, they will not be disapointed!

Instead I shall leave you with this parting comment which comes from an orrator and author of incredible, vision, courage and purpose! A man who achieved more relavance in a single half-hour speach, than Ms. Coulter is likely to have in her entire life! A man who any fool such as I who would write and speak to the public, should hold in warm reverence, and worshipful awe: Dr. Martin Luther King!

I quote from Dr. King's most excelent sermon from 1963 entittiled "Strength to Love":

"There is nothing more dangerous in the world than sincere ignorance and concientious stupidity"

Friday, June 09, 2006

IT'S MAGIC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh Shit!!! You're all wondering!!!! Two posts in a month!!!! Must be something alarming!!! Well it is! In fact it's something so alarming that even a jaded and disgusted follower of the Bush Administration such as myself was flabergasted by it!!!

Now! Let's take a look at all the important issues that need addressing in America today:

First and foremost is the War in Iraq, which has turned into a huge boondogle of epic proportions! WE listened to President Pork Pies lies, and WE bought his line of shit hook, line, and sinker! The result is one royal fuck up! We've lost any credabillity we ever had internationally, and evry day finds us deeper and deeper in a quagmire we may never get out of! All because The Great Shrub and his "Coalition of the Drilling" had a hard-on for Suddam Husein that you could hunt with! What do we have to show for it? Hundreds of thousands of Iraqis, and nearly 3000 of our troops lay dead! Tens of thousands of our young soldiers are Physically, mentaly, and emotionaly scarred for life for the glory of Haliburton, and the magisty of Exon Mobile! Unfortunatly, WE are going to have to bring closure to this debacle, and WE are paying for it!

This brings us to issue number two: The ridiculously rising price of motor fuel in America has hard working people suffering and oil companies showing obcenely HUGE profits! All the while smuggly sitting on their golden thrones telling us all to get over it! Of course, fat profits mean fat donations to Republican coffers for Bush and Company, assuring any meningful legislation concerning energy will get shot down in flames!

Speaking of those Republican coffers, Let's discuss the third issue: Members of the Republican lead Senate and House of Representatives are lined up drooling at the trough for sweet deals and soft money form the K Street Consortium! So many "Quid pro quote" deals are handed out to, and from fat cat lobbysts, that it hardly gets reported as news any more! One reason for this is because the media is firmly in the hands of Big Business and has a vested interest in keeping these deals quiet! Sleasy below the board deals, fat no bid contracts for multinational companies that prominent figures in government just happen to own huge blocks of stocks in, and shady shenanigans of all sorts are comitted openly and arogantly by lawmakers who think that We the People are all idiots! It's government "For the money, of the money, and by the money!" and nobody seems to get it!

This brings us to the fourthn issue: The economy! I hate to tell youn this, but the Economy of The United States is in DEEP SHIT!!!!! The G4 index isn't even posted any more, and the US Mint has printing presses running night and day, churning out trillions of dollars to prop up President Pork Pie's house of smoke and mirrors! The figures on Wall Street are nothing more than blatant lies and wishfull thinking! The whole nasty mess ids going to go into a death spiral that will make the Crash of '29 look like a minor inconvenience! I'm talking about the Enron incedent happening 75% of publicly traded companies across the board! Got stocks and bonds? SELL THEM NOW!!!!! BUY GOLD NOW!!!! Look at the price of gold! That's the surest economic test there is! The price of gold has skyrocketted against the dollar! It's the only currency that will have any value at all in America within a few years if we keep going like we're going now! In fact it may already be too late! Want t0o see where we're heading? Look at the USSR in the '90s! That;'s what happens when you fight a war you can't win with money you don't have!

On monday June 5 2006 The united States Senate, lead by The Republican Party began a session in an election year. Of all these pressing issues which could destroy this country what do yow thinkm they chose as their primary agenda for this session? A devisive gay marrige ammenment that had not a snowball's chance of Hell in passing comitee, much less making it onto the Senate floor for a real vote! In fact It couldn't even pass muster to even be debated! Even the pundits had to admit that it was all just slight if hand! A nice little piece of misdirection while the rabbit was placed in the hat! A little bait and switch to push the real issues real Americans are facing every day behind the velvet curtain, allowing the Great Magician and his attendants made their grand exit, while the theater burns down around the audiences ears! So enraged by the devicive drivel presented by President Pork Pie, and awed were they by the rich spectacle of TomKat Cruise, Angelina's baby, and American Idol, that they never smelled the smoke or saw the flames untill it was too late!

Don't think it can happen here? Well guess what! It happened in Egypt! It happened in Britain! It happened in Persia! It happened in The USSR! And it's happening here! Read your history!

"Those who cannot remember the past are condemed to repeat it!"
George Santayana
Dead Philosopher

Sunday, May 28, 2006

Weird shit! Wild shit! Woa shit! Bullshit! No shit!

Well what a time the government has had this week! A Democrat had his offices raided by the FBI and all the Republicans got pissed about it and DEMANDED that the raided and rounded up materials be returned post haste!!!

Alright people let's review! A DEMOCRAT got busted, and REPUBLICANS got pissed about it and rode to his rescue!!!!!???????!!!!! A REPUBLICAN apointtee ( Attorney General Gonzalas) swore he would QUIT if President Pork Pie got involved!! He stood up AGAINST the Republican anger untill all the FBI agents involved were given leave to finger the good Congessman's belongings to their little heart's content!

Black is white, day is night, and the heartbreak of psoriosis is now something shady characters sell on street corners by the gram! Dogs and cats are living together, and Ossama Bin Laden is the guest of honor at a Jewish wedding which he gladly attends! Suddam Husein has completed his sensitivity classes and is having a lovely time in Kurdistan where he was released after the Iraqi Tribunal decided he wasn't such a bad old fart after all!! It's all because, he had been abused as a child and that's what made him grow up to be such a prick! He'll be on Oprah as soon as he frinishes his heartfelt memoires entittled "A Million Little Corpses"!

Condi Rice finally comes clean about those sheep and that gallon jug of baby oil in the Lincoln Bedroom and explains the western saddle, while Bush and Cheney share a joint and sing "Cumbiyah" in the back ground.

A further uproar was heard at the Capitol Building this week. It seems that our hallowed halls of Congress were invaded by (gasp! Dare I say it!!) ELEVATOR REPAIRMEN!!!!! That's right, friends and neighbors! Elevator Repairmen! Plying their trade in the Capitol Building itself!!!!! Making loud noises with heavy steel implements!! Swinging on cables, servicing elevators, and eating sanwiches for lunch!! SANDWICHES, I TELL YOU!!!! SANDWICHES!!!! Consumed by union labor in the very seat of Big Money politics!Oh the HORROR!!! THE SHAME!!!

Of course the Washington Police had no choice but to leap shrieking to their feet, lock the whole joint down, don SWAT gear and run wildly about, kicking in doors, and waving a wide selection of firearms at the startled lawmakers and their staffs! So enthusiasticly was the kicking and waving done that a number of the people whose doors were kicked and in whose faces the firearms were waved took quite an offence to it! One would hope that having been the victims of such tactics these lawmakers would give pause before giving Police leave to kick in OUR doors and wave guns in OUR faces, because... Oh... I don't know... we might be smoking a plant that the law seems to think we should not be smoking? One would hope, just not very hard!!! After all! Hope in one hand, shit in the other... and...well you know how it goes!!!

Sunday, April 23, 2006

Oh Yea! By the Way!

They fixed my Dish Network system! Isn't that great! Now I have over 200 chanels of mindless shit to chose from! Has anyone been watching this shit that is presented as entertainment? This brainless crap filled with barely concious teen-agers acting like they have no sense whatsoever? The stupid soap-opras filled with sex and violence that hold all the church ladies spellbound right before they ran shrieking into the streets to bitch and moan about "South Park"? Let me tell you something! So far "South Park and a few offerins from "Link" and "FSTV" are the only things on TV that don't insult my intelegence or drive me bug-eyed into the street with rage!

And what the fuck is up with all these drug comercials? My God! The side effects are worse than the conditions this shit is supposed to treat! They sell an antacids and tell you that one of the side effects is abdominal pain! THAT"S WHY I"M TAKING THE ANTACID!!!!!! And I'm sure my wife will lose all her glorious memories concerning my 3 hour errection on my third day of anal seepage! Somehow I fail to see how it is helpful to have a rock-hard penis and anal seepage at the same time! It just seems like one would render the other useless! (Unless you ran with a real freaky crowd!) And the cartoon bee pedaling the $175.00 a bottle nasal spray... just...well...I'ld better not get started on that fucking bee or the $175.00 a bottle nasal spray!

My point is this: Watch television and you'll see what corporate America thinks and believes about the American public. They wave a flashy light in front of your eyes with one hand, and steal your money with the other. The only reason they do this is because they can! And they can because WE LET THEM!!!

So the good news is, that my Dish Network system works!
And the bad news is, that my Dish Network system works!

Monday, March 27, 2006

Fun and Games With Dish Network

Anybody out there got Dish Network equipment in their house? I feel for ya! Anybody planning to get Dish Network in their house? DON"T!!!!!

Since December, I've had 5 DVRs, and 3 service calls, and my stuff still doesn't work worth a shit! I was told my electrical system was shorted out, and THAT cost me $275.00 to find out my electrical sytem was just fine! I just got off the telephone with the unknowing who blythly led me down a trail strewn with shit and directed my feet to every turd! After being hung up on twice, I informed the lady on the other end I was going to call the local newspaper and invite them to my home to photograph me unloading high caliber firearms into every piece of Dish Network equipment presently sitting in my house doing nothing while I pay $75.00 a month for the privelege of it being here! I live in a small town, and that would be BIG news! They said they were going to give me back $54.99 for all the headaches and trauma, and send out a service technician Sunday. Will keep you posted!

The shit I go through just to get Free Speach TV!

Friday, March 24, 2006

You Might Be a Redneck Stoner If:

Well so far I guess I've pissed off Republicans, fundies, George Bush (Hell no I won't call the fucker Presidedent!), Karl Rove, and pissed bile all over everything good and Holy! (Ain't ya PROUD of me!)

I guess my next victim will be blue collar comedy. You know! Jeff Foxworthy and the boys! Never heard
Jeff Foxworthy ever admit to smoking herb. Of course if you ride on a bus with Larry The Cable Guy, and Ron "Tater Salad" White you got to be burnin' something or the place would turn into a mobile crime scene! Since Jeff won't touch the subject because his family based comedy gods would frown on it, I guess it's up to somebody that really doesn't give a flying fuck about what Standards and Practices has to say about the matter! My standards are pretty low, and if you're as good as me you don't have to practice! So let's do this thing!

You might be a redneck stoner if you've ever smoked pot through something that was part of a car.

You might be a redneck stoner if you've ever been too stoned to watch television.

You might be a redneck stoner if your last bong came from Home Depot.

You might be a redneck stoner if you've ever made a bong out of part of an animal.

If you've ever made a bullet into a roach clip you might be a redbneck stoner.

If you've ever thrown a perfectly good cigar away, but kept the glass tube it came in, You might be a redneck stoner.

You might be a redneck stoner if you've found six foot tall marijauna plants growing where you throw seeds, and been surprised by the discovery.

If you've ever found a joint that went through the laundry, and still smoked it, you could be a redneck stoner.

If the last poignant father and son moment you remember is when you taught the fruit if your loins how to make a roach clip out of a stick, you could be a redneck stoner.

If you've ever used an automotive tool to smoke pot, you could be a redneck stoner.

If you have an ATV modified to carry gardening tools, you might be a redneck stoner.

And last but not least: If you've ever addressed a police officer by saying, "Hi! Are you?" You might be a redneck stoner.... and not too bright!

Tuesday, February 28, 2006

I'm back! Miss me?

After a great deal of inner soul searching brought about by the reckless abuse of several different controlled substances, I have pierced the veil that shades the future and seen that which can only be described as utter bullshit! I will share with you my vision.

A great seer shall arise and show that since Ronald Wilson Reagan has six letters in each of his names, it don't mean shit! He's dead, and he will stay that way! And all through the land great rejoicing is heard!

In an atempt to save the administration any further embaressment, the decision to assainate "Scooter" Libby is given to the CIA. In a manner not inconcistent with the CIA's well-documented bungling, the sniper aims at Scooter libby's head and shoots Karl Rove in the ass! Cheney goes into a total mind-fuck at the sound of the gunfire and the sight of the blood Grinning maniacly and armed with a shot gun loaded with birdshot, he procedes to the Supreme Court in search of lawyers which he has declared to be his prey!

Scooter Libby having noted the attempt on his life, begins telling the truth, and answering all questions addressed to him. Up to and including the presence of six live sheep, a western saddle, and a gallon of baby oil in the Lincoln bedroom whenever Condi Rice comes to visit. The result is this wholey illogical and impossible act causes the laws of physics to take a long hike and all manners of illogical, and impossible shit starts to happen! Marijauna is legalized, produced imediatly, rolled and smoked by all present! A great cloud of weed smoke settles over the capitol, causing great turmoil amongst the Republicans when they finally discover George Bush was not concieved of a virgin! And even if he was, Barbara Bush still raised him so it's HER FAULT!!!!! Teams of dilligent and harworking journalists turn a deaf ear to the pleas of the corporate elite and a blind eye to the grubby hands thrusting money and pronounce the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth about all sorts of shit that the subjects of this truth find most inconveniant! Undetered by bribes, threats, or political correctness they sally forth and paint the whole city with a thick coat of reality. Federal prosecuters decend on Washington DC in waves of plagues! Snapping up the now naked politicians and dragging them off to the land of Terra Haute Federal Lock-up. Where they are forced to make blankets for Libertarians!

Barbara Bush arives and gets lost in the huge cloud of Marijauna smoke and forgets what she came for! After finding Jeb and George playing Genocidal Conservatives and Indians with "Chang the Mystic Warrior" She spank's their pasty white asses for "being weasely little shits and fibbing to all those nice Democrats on the investigative comittees! Jeb gets extra whacks for playing with imaginary friends when he's too old to do so, and giving naughty, big, sharp swords to his little friends in the Florida Legislature who are neither old enough or responsible enough to play with such dangerous toys!

Armed Isreali settlers and Palastinian refugees race at eachother from two sides of the city untill they get lost in the pot cloud. When they find their way out again, they have forgotten what they were so pissed at eachother about, and they all take off together in search of a decent chicken place. Along the way they find Scooter Libby. Figuring any old chicken will do, they eat him!

Further information is $3.95 a minute! Operators are standing by!

Friday, January 27, 2006

George W, Bush is a Lousy Fucking Traitor

That's right! I said it! This madman with his delusions of godhood is well on his way to destroying all that is good and great aabout this country and I'm jolly well PISSED about it!

How dare this fuck-brained neocon describe the Constitution of The United States of America as that "That goddamned piece of paper"! HOW FUCKING DARE HE!!!!!!! This jerk-off took the same oath as I did! "To protect the Constitution of the United States of America from all enemies foreign and domestic"! By his own words and deeds, he has broken that oath and now stands as the greatest threat to the Constitution that this country has seen since the Civil War! The only moral thing for Bush to do now is blow his own brains out! (If he can find a gun with sights fine enough to hit a target that small!)

How dare this shaven ape in a cheap suit call himself a "War time President"! What a crock of shit! A war based on a lie that he said was over months ago! There is no fucking war! Iraq? That's not a war! That's a neocon trick to steal a country's oil! He said he would go by whatever the Irqi citizens said in their much-touted election! They said (quite clearly!) they wanted us the fuck out! We're still there!

Bush needs to give it up and go the fuck back to Texas! Hell I'll even buy him a bus ticket!

Tuesday, January 17, 2006

King George the Dim!!!

Alright folks! I promised something really scary and I will deliver! This is scarier than "President Dan Quale"!

It seems The Comander and Thief signed brand new executive orders that gives him SOLE authority to declare martial law, suspend the Posse Comitatus Act, and suspend habeas corpus! Yep! That's right! George Bush has finally made his grand grab for dictatorial power!

In fact, he actually discussed imposing martial law in the streets of the United States after the 9/11 attacks by the activation of the "national security initiatives" put in place by "Ronnie Ray Gun" back in the '80s

These "national security initiatives" were hatched by Oliver North, and charged FEMA with the administration of executive orders which would allow the suspension of the Coinstitution, establishment of internment camps, implimenting martial law, and turning over the government of The United States over to the President!

How did this sad state of affairs happen? Good question! Let's find some answers; Shall we?

It seems this all started with former FEMA director Louis Guiffrida, who had a great fear of a "national uprising of black millitants"! He came up with a plan to put 21 million African Americans in "relocation camps" He then passed the plan of to John Brinkerhoff who developed the martial law implementation plan following the guide Guiffrida drew up. Ronnie Ray Gun looked it over and liked what he saw. He signed off on it and the initiatives were put into place and forgotten about untill King George the Dim took office.

Enter the Neocons! It seems Brinkerhoff moved on to the infamous Anser Institute for Homeland Security, and following the 9/11 attacks, provided arguments for implimenting "national scurity initiatives" which would allow the implimentation of martial law and the suspension of the Posse Comitatus Act of 1878.

Bush used parts of this plan to send US troops into the streets of New Orleans after Katrina as well as allowing FEMA to hire the mersenary Blackwater USA firm to "enforce security"

The Department of Homeland Security has established the "Northern Command for National Deffence. Which is and incredibly wide ranging program that includes not only FEMA, but the Pentagon, the FBI, and the National Security Agency. Executive orders have already been signed by Bush allowing the Northern Command to send troops into American streets, Sieze controll of radio, and television stations and networks and impose martial law in times of "national emergency"!

Make a guess who has SOLE authority to declare what is and is not a "national emergency"? Yep! You nailed it! George W. himself! Oh and you can forget about such petty annoyances as Congresional oversight! He doesn't have to consult of seek the approval of Congress for permision to completly take over the Government of the United States, and assume absolute power!

I've been trying to get a comfirmation from any government agencies about this but all I get is "We can neither confirm or deny" bullshit. Nobody seems to want to talk about it!

Tuesday, January 03, 2006

If This Doesn't Piss You Off, Nothing Will

I just learned today that the Radical Right Wing Neocons have a brand new trick! This one even took me by surprise!

It seems that some hate- spewing jerk-off masquerading as a man of God has a brand new trick! HE AND HIS CONGREGATION ARE PROTESTING FUNERALS OF OUR HONERED DEAD!!! That's right folks! This right-wing nut-job is marching around funerals for our fallen soldiers from Bush's little misadventure, waving signs that say things like "Thank God For Dead Soldiers", and "God Hates Fags"! So much for all the stickers and ribbons that say "Support our Troops" next to those fish on all the pundit's trunk lids!

This group from the Westboro Babtist Church in Topeka Kansas is led by the Reverend, (and I use the term losley) Fred Phelps. A 76 year old hate- spewing bigot who has been protesting gay funerals for 15 years.

"Our view of this situation is that God Almighty blew these kids to smithereens and sent them to hell.", This sanctimonious prick told Doug Thompson of "The Capitol Hill Blues" ( He further stated that "God is punishing a fag army- don't ask, don't tell- For a fag-loving agenda of a fag loving nation!"

It would be bad enough if we were talking about a few isolated incedents, but this is far bigger than that! These lousy stinking Anti- American Neocons have turned up at over 70 funerals in the last few months, wving their signs and jeering at the parents of slain Americn slodiers as they spend their last few precious moments with their children after giving their all to their country!

At the funeral of 21 year old Army Infantryman Christopher Alcozar, a group of half a dozen of these sick, lousey, whack- jobs waved signs and shouted hate- filled slogans at the assembled mourners.

"It was bad enough that I got harrassed after I got out of Vietnam", said Jesse Alcozer of Elmhurst Illinois, the father of the slain infantryman, "But after 37 years of trying to get rid of this wound, they are doing this to my son."

Now in this time of unwarranted wiretaps and the wost of "The Patriot Act" brought to bear against Peta and vegans, Bush calls these sick fuckers "his base" It sure as hell wouldn't do for any of them to show up here at any funeral that I may have to attend. (I have two nephews and a cousin in Iraq). They would quickly learn that I believe in and exercise my second ammendment rights! And here they would never find a jury to convict me!

About Me

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Well!! I'm not here to be on anybody's side! I DON'T like George W. Bush and I will NOT call the bastard president! I'll call him President Pork Pie, but that is about as close as it gets! I'm not here to comfort the afflicted, but to afflict the comfortable! I learned a long time ago, that if you can make somebody laugh and think at the same time, they'll learn something! I'm trying to teach the American Public that there is another point of view out there, beside the Right Wing's This country's on a greased chute to Hell with Bush as it's Captain! I for one will not sit idley by while he drives the land that I love into the ground! This is my gift to this country. Maybe it's a little crude at times, maybe, it's a little rude at times! But in my world, rude and crude works! I'll post what I damn well please here and invite people to post comments the same way! Rant all you want!! I do! Freedom of Speech is the order of the day here! Like it? Let me know! Don't like it? Let me know! Silence me? AIN'T GONNA HAPPEN! So welcome one and all to STONEY'S RAGE!! It's all for America! I don't make a dime off it! And I won't have it any other way!