President Pork Pie's Busy Week

Well! Hasn't President Pork Pie had a busy time THIS week!

First he takes Tony Blair to the seedy side of life by sharing profanities while dining with the table manners of a cud-chewing goat at the G8 conference! You'ld think that this unfortunate incedent would be enough for The Comander and Theif at the G8, but no! It seems that he had heard that some countries in the world still had a positive attitude towards The United States and it's President, and he was having none of that! He would prove to all and sundry that this country indeed has a madman at the helm, and this was his time to shine!

With a disturbingly leacherous grin on his face, he siezed the German Chancellor by the shoulders, and attempted to give her a massage. The good lady responded to his unwanted attention as if something cold, wet and clammy was trying to crawl into her clothes! I suppose if he was hoping to provide her with a "happy ending" he was shit out of luck! In fact, the only thing he didn't do at the G8 conference was scratch his balls, and pick his nose! And he probably did, but we just didn't get it on tape! (We can all give thanks now, for small miracles!)

After sharing with the world these unseemly escapades, and once again proving to the world at large that no male member of the Bush family can keep his mouth shut or his hands to himself when traveling abroad, Air Force One whisked the Dimpled Darling of the Desperatley Deluded back to Capitol Hill. Ever being one to keep a bad thing rolling, he dusted off his "Veto" stamp and handily made Nancy Reagan cry and disenfranchised 72% of the American People by vetoing a stem cell research bill that would have given hope to millions of suffering Americans! (My own CP afflicted stepson being one of them!)

Of course he wasn't the only Republican to make a total ass of himself this week over stem cell research. Seator Sam Brownback of Kansas produced a poster of an eagle and an egg, and used it to offer an argument which states by it's logic that he is indeed a vaginal orifice. As an encore he produced a child's artwork with lots of Xs and Os, and explained that the figures rendered were human embryos. He goes on to explain that one embryo (with hair and a smiley face no less) represented the one that got adopted. The frowning ones were sad because they were frozen, and one was crying piteously "You're going to kill me?!"

One can understand how a young child could fail to understand that these embryos are microscopic blobs of protoplasm, being held in a suspended animation. We can understand that a child could not and should not be expected to know that embryos in this state have neither hair or faces. However Senator Sam Brownback of Kansas should know better! But then again, what can you expect from a man, who fancies himself a vagina, and proudly goes to go to great lengths to prove it with the use of visual aids on the floor of The United States Senate?!!

Ah yes! It has been a busy week indeed for Bush and Company! But it is only Thursday morning, and three whole days are left! I DO wonder what they'll do next? Maybee kick some puppies, or burn some kittens, or rectally insert firecrackers into a toad.. Oh wait! He already did the toad thing!

I've come to the conclusion that Bush, like Steven King, does indeed have the heart of a small boy! And like Steven King, he probably keeps it in a jar on his desk!

President Pork Pie's Birthday

Well!! Today is President Pork Pie's birthday! I should be overjoyed! Guess what? I'm not!

The very fact that we have this gibbering idiot in the White House should scare the shit out of one and all! I'm sure all the pubdits on Faux News will be falling over themselves to be the first ones to blow sunshine up his ass. Bill O'Rielly will probably want to blow something else up his ass! I believe I've talked enough about George Bush's ass!